‘Reason to believe’

My father and I were chatting the other day and somehow the song ‘Reason to believe’ came up in the conversation. I knew that Rod Stewart had sung the song but wasn’t sure who the original composer was. I played it on my phone and we sang along. As I sang, the lyrics brought flashbacks of my former life. How profound this song is!

If I listened long enough to you,
I’d find a way to believe that it’s all true.
Knowing, that you lied straight-faced while I cried,
Still I look to find a reason to believe.        

Someone like you makes it hard to live without
Somebody else,
Someone like you makes it easy to give
Never think about myself.   

If I gave you time to change my mind
I’d find a way just to leave the past behind
Knowing that you lied straight-faced while I cried
Still I look to find a reason to believe.

Tim Hardin (1965).

There are some people who always see the good in the people that other people write off. They are perceived as the bad apples of society. I saw the good in my ex-husband and felt he was harshly judged by others. Given his childhood, I was surprised that he wasn’t a great deal more imbalanced. I understood his quirks and because of his commitment to self-healing, I committed to support him on his journey of healing. Although I knew it would pose many challenges, I wasn’t scared. I loved him and his restoration was going to be a testament to the efficacy of God.

To the outsider listening in on a conversation between the victim and perpetrator, the lies are so obvious. Maybe it’s obvious to the victim as well, but we become so blinded by the capacity of the perpetrator to do good, that we lose sight of the fact that they don’t do good; at least not by their partner. While we may not see through their lies all the time (the whole point about being a good liar is that the tales are very plausible), but there are times when you can feel the deceit. Yet we look to find a reason to believe. We want so much to believe in them as a decent human that we fail to process the plethora of consistent toxic patterns of behaviours exhibited before our very eyes. In a micro second we forgive the hurtful repetitive wrongs and wave away the past fabrications and misconduct. We think more of the perpetrator and less and less about self. It’s not altruistic, it’s emotional suicide.

Honesty lives confidently and carefree, but shifty is sure to be exposed, Proverbs 10:9.

The Message Bible

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