The Legacy of Women.

My mother shared a piece of family history which I wish to share today.

My great grandfather bought a piece of cloth and asked my great grandmother to make a dress with it for my mother. My grandmother was trying to make a ‘better life’ for herself so that she could eventually send for my mother. In the meantime my great grandmother took on the role of ‘mother’ to my mum. My great grandmother looked at the cloth and informed her husband that it wouldn’t be enough to make a dress and left it at that.

A few weeks passed. My great grandmother was asked why a dress hadn’t been made yet. She gave him the same reply as before, that the cloth wouldn’t be enough to make a dress for my mother. My great grandmother wasn’t a seamstress but she was in the habit of buying cloth and giving it to the the village seamstress to make clothes for my mother. So all things considered, she knew what she was talking about right? He raised his walking stick and struck her. Whether or not he meant it as the intended target, her breast bore the brunt of the wallop from his walking stick. My mother witnessed this, and as he raised his stick to beat my great grandmother again, my mother sprinted from the yard. She headed to the yard of her grand aunt who lived nearby.

“Auntie come quick, grandad is beating my grandma with his stick!”

She wasted no time. She screamed out to her sister who lived just below her through the bushes. “Cissy! Come fast. David is killing Agnes with his stick!” My great grand-aunts were aged but fearless. When my mother’s grand aunts arrived, they dragged their brother-in-law off of my great grandmother. They returned the favour on behalf of their sister . . . they each had a stick. Perceiving that they perhaps wouldn’t stop, my great grandmother mustered up the last of her strength to stop them and tell them that they had beaten him enough. They looked at her then at each other and shrugged their shoulders. The avenging sisters each took an arm, dragged him across the yard and threw him into the bushes and left. He had never beaten her before, he should have kept up that trend because he almost paid with his life for that incident. Needless to say he never beat her after that.

My mother said, “Byooti, you come from a long line of strong women. They were by no means perfect. Sometimes they quarreled and wouldn’t speak to each other for a time, but if you messed with one, you messed with all of them, they were formidable women. They stood up for themselves and each other. They didn’t take nonsense from anybody. You have had quite a journey, you have the scars to prove it, but I also know it’s made you stronger”.

I come from a line of strong women and I am proud of that. Genesis 2 relates the creation of man and woman. God in His wisdom saw that it wasn’t a good idea for Adam to be alone so He created Eve. She was to be His helper and companion. Eve wasn’t supposed to boss Adam around and tell him what she thought his job should be, neither was it her job to sit back and do nothing. Eve was Adam’s teammate in every sense of the word. God gave us a beautiful role in life, and if we are not blessed in that particular way to have our own teammate, we can be a teammate and companion to relatives, friends and countless others.

It takes a sense of pride and strength to fulfil God’s plan in our lives when it comes to a monogamous relationship. It is equally important to be just as strong when your partner stands in your way and doesn’t allow you to accomplish this. Humanity are fearfully and wonderfully, which means absolutely no one has the right to make you feel that you are not a Prince or Princess of the Most High. My grand-aunts took a stand and were not about to let their sister be beaten. I wish I had taken a stand sooner in my marriage. Hindsight is seldom useful, but I’m here now. God has enabled me to stand strong, and by His might and through His strength I will not be broken again.

Then he answered me and spake unto me saying, This is the word of the Lord unto Zerubbabel, saying, Not by might, nor by power, but by my spirit, saith the Lord of hosts. Zechariah 4:6.  

King James Bible

If you would like to share your story send me an email to byootifulashes@gmail.com!

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