As I drew my curtains this morning I couldn’t help but notice the familiar grey skies. So bleak and seemingly lacking in hope. I have always found this time of year difficult. At this time of year it always feels as if the sky only exists in two colours; grey and black. The blue ones are far and few between. My daily chant is “Spring? Come back, all is forgiven!”. When I passed a blossoming tree yesterday I smiled. Spring hasn’t forgotten us, it is on the horizon. It will very soon sojourn with us again.
If you are in an abusive relationship, then you already live in a permanent shade of grey. Reluctant to speak because this may lead to another argument. Though you are grateful for the reprieve, you are cautious when they are happy since you don’t know how long that will last. You are wary from all the forgiveness tokens you hand out throughout the day, every day. Ironically you know you will be handing out tokens tomorrow and the day after for the exact same infractions. You are exhausted from being on high alert every day. You don’t know when they will detonate from some perceived unforgivable slight on your part. You don’t know how long the fanatical berating lava flow of words will spill from their mouth for or when It will return. You only know that it will revisit. Soon.
Today isn’t the day to give up. Today will not be that day. They do not get to break your spirit today. You are not the verbal punch bag or their contentious door mat. You are who He says you are. You are a child of God. It was Never His plan for you to endure existence in grey. Recolour your life. “God puts rainbows in the clouds so that each of us – in the dreariest and most dreaded moments – can see a possibility of hope,” Maya Angelou.